idk

whether I'm doing something wrong for the benefit of others. Whenever I have things to do, there's never time for other people. I want to spend time with my friends, but as much as I love doing individual activities, I can't be with so many people at once. I tell others that I need my space and I need to get away from distractions, but it hurts to know that there are friends who are desperate to talk to me, to see me, to be with me. If there was a way for me to get away from everything. I want to start running again. I want to be free from everything and just RUN. There wouldn't be any distractions but the finish line. I don't want this or that. I just want to get through it all.
NO, I do not like to shut people out of my lives. I WOULD NOT LIKE TO LOSE ANYONE. ANYONE! There should be no doubt of leaving ONE person behind in my life as if they're a nano piece of puzzle connected to my life. Without water, there's no fish. Without you, there's no one I can think of without you.

I hate to say this but. I NEED TO BACK OFF AND JUST CHILL. I'm looking forward to 2010. That's when the REAL new year will begin.